Supporting Yourself Through Grief
Grieving is a deeply personal journey, one that touches us to the core. As a therapist, I have had the privilege of holding space for many individuals riding the waves of grief. Each person's path is unique, but there are some gentle, supportive ways to help you through this difficult time. Below, I want to share some suggestions on how to support yourself.
1. Embrace Your Emotions
Grief brings with it a whirlwind of emotions – sadness, anger, confusion, and sometimes even relief. All these feelings are valid and part of the process. Allow yourself to feel without judgment. Cry if you need to, scream if you must, and laugh when it comes. Emotions need to be felt to be processed.
2. Reach Out for Support
Grief can feel incredibly isolating, but you do not have to go through it alone. Speak with friends, family, or an even a support group. Sharing your story and hearing from others can be a powerful source of comfort. If you find it difficult to talk about your loss, writing a letter to a friend or joining an online grief community can also provide solace.
3. Create a Routine
In the chaos of grief, routines can offer structure. Simple daily activities – making your bed, going for a walk, or having meals at regular times – can create a sense of normalcy. These small acts can provide stability when everything else feels out of your control.
4. Express Yourself
Art, music, and writing are powerful outlets for expressing yourself. Paint, draw, write poetry, or sing and dance it out. Create a scrapbook of memories or write letters that you do not send. These creative expressions can be cathartic, helping you to process and release your emotions.
5. Prioritise Self-Care
Self-care may feel hard. Grief takes a toll not just emotionally, but physically as well. Be gentle with yourself. Ensure you are nourishing your body, getting enough rest (grief is tiring), and engaging with people you feel safe and authentic with. Even a short walk with a friend can be incredibly healing.
6. Honour Your Loved One
Finding ways to honour and remember your loved one can bring comfort. Plant a tree, create a memory box, light a candle, or celebrate their life on special dates. These rituals can help you feel connected and active in keeping their memory alive.
7. Seek Professional Help When Needed
Sometimes, the weight of grief is too much to carry alone. There is no shame in seeking help from a therapist. Professional support can provide you with tools and strategies to navigate your grief, therapy is a safe space to explore your feelings.
8. Be Patient with Yourself
The grieving process is not linear.. There will be good days and bad days, and that is normal. Be patient and kind to yourself. Healing takes time, and it’s okay to move at your own pace. Whatever that looks like.
9. Mindfulness Practices
Mindfulness and meditation can help you stay present and grounded. Deep breathing exercises, yoga, or simply sitting quietly and observing your thoughts can provide a moment of calm amidst the storm of emotions. These practices can help you reconnect with yourself and find moments of peace.
10. Make Space for Joy
Now this one may be hard to read, but it's okay to find joy again. Engaging in life again doesn't mean you are forgetting. Watch your favourite movie, spend time with friends, laugh. Allowing yourself to experience joy is part of your healing process.
Remember that grief is the response to loss. By supporting yourself through this journey, you honour not only your loved one, but also your own resilience and strength. Remember, it’s okay to seek help and to lean on others. You are not alone.